The live-in relationships I've attempted haven't turned into the stuff with which fairy tales are made. At this point my question (to me) is how come I've faced situations as these over & over? Like many others I tend to get hurt from relationships. I end up with some bad feelings and the negativity is hard to deal with. I've pondered many of these issues to great lengths.
I think the reason hurt happens more with men (than women) is due to our having a different physiological make-up. Women tend to be feeling & emotional creatures, who need loving.
They need to be appreciated & pampered (some more than others) for the lovely & beautiful creatures. They love hearing how special they are. You can not tell a women too many time that you love everything about them. How they talk, walk & how good they look in the clothes they wear. Even the food they cook, & everything they do you must appreciate. We all need to feel loved. But love is a two way street. With lots of speed traps in between.
In the relationship area women rule. Ah Feelings! Women are structured to feel everything & anything. If we're having a bad day, we don't have to say a word, because our woman can sense it. When things are going great they can pick up on this & we don't have to say anything.
They notice everything! A lot of things which men miss a woman picks up on. Remember each & every man was brought into this world by a woman, his mother. Women comprehend what we are about much more than us.
Since relationships are based upon feelings, and because Women are the masters in the 'feelings' department, it is logical to reason out that women will always have the upper hand when the topic of relationships comes up. We know what we feel, and we are sometimes in tune with our emotional side. But a woman can tune in to your emotional side even when you do not notice it. A women can understand so much about you, and not let on that she knows anything about it. Women can be sneaks & tricksters though, so men must be careful in their dealings with Women. The fact is that this world could not run the way it does, if it weren't for their softness, and nurturing natures, which they apply to all aspects of life. We men get frustrated (at times) and at other times feel very confounded by them. All the same, we're completely fascinated by the species of females. We will be willing to pay good money just to watch them as they prance around and strip down to nothing. We spend a great deal of our time trying to attract and impress females.
We will think about them, often will fight over them, and we wish to be loved by them. It has been proven that men think about women many more times each day than a women does thinking about her man.
I'm Howard Buchin and I welcome your comments and/or questions to my site The Relationship Guru.
Thank you in advance for your input.
Wednesday, 10 October 2012
Monday, 1 October 2012
Breaking Up Is Hard to do.
Breaking Up
What's the right way to break-up? What is involved in breaking up properly? Are there a set of reasonable steps one should follow to cleanly break up? It should be easy to be single again. It should be straightforward but why isn't it? It's not simple at all. In fact it is more complex than trying to find someone, to 'couple' with in the first place. Getting back to singledom can be a rocky road.
Do you suddenly exclaim, 'Hey honey. I've an idea, let's go back living separate lives & start enjoying our lives again? This relationship we have is the pits!'
Hang on buster! Not so fast. Remember that both of you realized at one point you had feelings for one another and now both of you have to come the conclusion that your relationship is now going nowhere. The decision to split is usually made by one party over the other. This makes it really tough decision. Splitting up is hard, & sticking with your decision is very difficult. It is usually all for the best though. Making the decision to split will be just the first of many hard obstacles you are going to have to face as per the break up.
The feelings involved in splitting up are complicated. Even though it might the decision might be one that you made, there's a strong feeling of being rejected. Even worse there is a feeling of getting cast aside, or dumped as it's called. I can't describe the full range of feelings since there are so many you must endure. Going through the (break-up) process when separating you start to understand why women are so complicated. They are all about emotions and feelings.
Breaking apart is almost like you are attending a funeral, in this case you are free to tell your mate some final parting volleys of criticism or whatever. They are like the soon-to-be deceased. It feels morbid to have known someone for so long so intimately and now to realize you'll likely never cross paths again. It is like a death of sorts. There is a defined grieving period after it's over. This is in order that each of your brains is allowed to comprehend what has happened, and accept it as reality. There is no longer going to be someone there for you. And you will no longer be there for someone else as well. Nobody to listen to your complaints, & nobody to sit and patiently and assist you with life's everyday disasters.
What happens to the dream of being together? For now it's over, and possibly it over for ever. It's the end of the road. The bitter end as they call it. You must make a fresh start. Each party must begin again. If you want it or not you must start again.
If you've been involved with a live-in, common law relationship, as I was, then there's a lot less legal matters to deal with. But that doesn't mean you do not need to consult with a lawyer. That doesn't mean you don't have to deal with all the items purchased when you were a couple. It's never easily divided up as you might guess. We had a male and female cat who were inseparable from being very young. How could we separate them? I was against splitting them up, but my feeling was over-ruled. This is why things have to be made clear from the outset. The old saying goes that Family Court is a bad choice of places to start to work out a Separation Agreement or Divorce Settlement, is very true.
Just when you think you are over it, once in a while something comes up, and it seems you start to run through the gamut of emotions. Feelings and emotions are very deep, much more so than the logical or thinking parts to our brain. So the hurt is felt much more deeply.
It is harder breaking off from a bad relationship than a good one. Why is this true? I suppose because more emotions are tied up (even though they are more negative) when you are embroiled in a bad relationship. Do you remember the last time you were really really mad. How about the last time you were very happy? Both of those events would be so ingrained into your consciousness, and most of the time those feelings which are negative, are more powerful than the good ones.
It is almost akin to being fired from a job. You are left with the feeling that those bosses were just pure crap anyways! But then, after some reflection you begin to wonder if there were things you could have done differently, ending up with a very different outcome?
In my next installment, I will delve into the matter of how you begin to formulate a Separation Agreement and other steps necessary in breaking up.
he
Sunday, 20 November 2011
Relationship Guru
Relationships
Are you considering entering into a new relationship? Are you debating the merits of getting involved with someone? Most of us don't own crystal balls, & for those of us who're single it's easy to overlook many important things, that at some point, will have to be ironed out. I suggest that you think before starting upon the rocky road of romantic couple-dom, in order to avoid the many pot holes that can occur, and then the eventual u-turns which can make your journey hardly worth the risk.
Here are a series of questions I believe every potential couple should give consideration:
* Do you plan to reside at one location, or apart? Would a bi-weekly visit be enough together time do you plan to reside full-time as one unit?
* Do you own your property, and if so do you wish to put the partner on the 'Deed'?
* If so how much space are you willing to allocate to your new partner to make them feel at home?
* Wikipedia, defines a partnership as:
'... an arrangement where parties agree to cooperate to advance their mutual interests.'
* Are you equally interested in a full-blown serious relationship, which may lead to matrimonial vows &/or children?
** What percentage of the responsibilities & expenses will you be expecting to shoulder & what does your partner plan to take on? For instance, if your partner was independently wealthy would you expect that it might be reasonable for them to share their wealth? Do they feel comfortable with the sharing of 'their' weatlh?
* What happens in the event of a purchase of a large ticket item such as a freezer, fridge, stove, air conditioner, or barbeque? Who pays for these things and then who maintains them and whom shall be name as the owner of such items?. It is not uncommon for items to be tagged and identified, but only when the children of an elderly are deciding upon who gets what in the event of their demise.
It's only important in the event of a split or separation. Today there's a high percentage of couples choosing not to stay together for whatever reasons they decide these things upon. Statistics (unfortunately) speak volumes about the fact everyone starting a live-in relationship should not rule out the possibility of a separation at some point.
*Do either of you wish to, or currently have pets or children & at some point, or do you wish to?
* What might happen if you two partners can not agree on some issue & what if the issue is one of the kind both parties refuse to budge on? Can a third party help you? Can you agree upon who this might be? How do you feel about attending couples counseling or psychologists' offices? Many people refuse to consider airing their differences in front of strangers and in such circumstances.
There are so many considerations that it's very difficult to come to an agreement upon where to begin. Nobody should feel that they are all alone with this feeling of being overwhelmed.
I'll start right @ home, where just about everything begins. You've now decided that the love of your life, your partner is going to live under the same roof as yourself. Happy together, all in one locale. This is considered to be a common law couple (and representing the highest number of couples now in Canada).
Where is this love-nest to be located?
If I'm to live with Jane, and Jane owns her own property, how much might Jane expect that I should reasonably be paying (her) for my accommodations?
In the case of my owning my own home, & then asking my partner (Jane) to live with me, should I now consider offering 'Jane' a percentage of the ownership of the property/ Is this the only way Jane might feel herself an equal partner.
Remember, a relationship is all about being in a 'partnership.' And for a partnership to work, there must be some semblance of sharing of responsibilities and of costs. If this is not put in force, then the relationship will always have one party having an unfair advantage over the other. In every partnership there is something of a power struggle that goes on, but if you're spouse is living on your property, then should you be able to pull the plug at any time you feel unhappy. Can you then ask/demand that your mate then cease and desist, or face the reality of packing up her stuff and leaving.
On the other hand, if you've paid the bulk of the costs associated with a property, let's say $100,000, and then someone meets up with you, whom you wish to cohabitate with, is it then reasonable to assume you should sign over 50% of your main asset? Is your new love interest that trustworthy and of such value? Possibly not.
A lot of this kind of thinking is rooted in money, which should not be such a large consideration, since relationships are supposed to be based on feelings, and not based on the monetary and physical aspects of life. Of course if you, at the start a relationship have very little collateral, and then changes occur where you get that big raise, suddenly any original agreement may need to have occasional amendments made. Otherwise it will become a useless jaded document.
In the instance where Jane moves in with me to my property, and then finds that any extra cash that I earn I wish to invest into bettering my property, and not showing Jane a good time, she may reconsider her decision to move in with me.
I think that it's always a good idea if the couple is to live in an owned property, to consider the possibility of shared ownership.
* Of course the next conundrum for the two of you is whether you will work the details out after you've moved in, or before. If you negotiate after the fact, it's kind of like taking home a new car, and then calling the dealership and trying to negotiate on the price and terms for the vehicle. You may get to kick the tires and take it for a spin around the block, but you don't get to take it home with you for a month or two prior to signing the deal.
There is another reason why these considerations are paramount for me, in my mind to be worked out prior to making any large decisions. This is due to the fact that during the negotiation stage you both might begin working on, you should be getting strong indications on how flexible or inflexible he/she is. Your prospective partner may show in the many days ahead that they were never as flexible a person as you would want to have as a partner . This will show you how easy or difficult it will be to solve complex issues that may come up from time to time. If your partner is completely unwilling to make any concessions, this may be a good time to reconsider any decision to take a first step into a live-in relationship.
In my next installment I shall tackle more relationship issues, ones surrounding the issues around Children, & ways you can circumvent problems that couples have to face.
Email your questions to the relationship Guru, & I'll answer them. Mark questions as Private if you do not wish for your questions to be published, Names will not be published.
howardbuchin@gmail.com
Are you considering entering into a new relationship? Are you debating the merits of getting involved with someone? Most of us don't own crystal balls, & for those of us who're single it's easy to overlook many important things, that at some point, will have to be ironed out. I suggest that you think before starting upon the rocky road of romantic couple-dom, in order to avoid the many pot holes that can occur, and then the eventual u-turns which can make your journey hardly worth the risk.
Here are a series of questions I believe every potential couple should give consideration:
* Do you plan to reside at one location, or apart? Would a bi-weekly visit be enough together time do you plan to reside full-time as one unit?
* Do you own your property, and if so do you wish to put the partner on the 'Deed'?
* If so how much space are you willing to allocate to your new partner to make them feel at home?
* Wikipedia, defines a partnership as:
'... an arrangement where parties agree to cooperate to advance their mutual interests.'
* Are you equally interested in a full-blown serious relationship, which may lead to matrimonial vows &/or children?
** What percentage of the responsibilities & expenses will you be expecting to shoulder & what does your partner plan to take on? For instance, if your partner was independently wealthy would you expect that it might be reasonable for them to share their wealth? Do they feel comfortable with the sharing of 'their' weatlh?
* What happens in the event of a purchase of a large ticket item such as a freezer, fridge, stove, air conditioner, or barbeque? Who pays for these things and then who maintains them and whom shall be name as the owner of such items?. It is not uncommon for items to be tagged and identified, but only when the children of an elderly are deciding upon who gets what in the event of their demise.
It's only important in the event of a split or separation. Today there's a high percentage of couples choosing not to stay together for whatever reasons they decide these things upon. Statistics (unfortunately) speak volumes about the fact everyone starting a live-in relationship should not rule out the possibility of a separation at some point.
*Do either of you wish to, or currently have pets or children & at some point, or do you wish to?
* What might happen if you two partners can not agree on some issue & what if the issue is one of the kind both parties refuse to budge on? Can a third party help you? Can you agree upon who this might be? How do you feel about attending couples counseling or psychologists' offices? Many people refuse to consider airing their differences in front of strangers and in such circumstances.
There are so many considerations that it's very difficult to come to an agreement upon where to begin. Nobody should feel that they are all alone with this feeling of being overwhelmed.
I'll start right @ home, where just about everything begins. You've now decided that the love of your life, your partner is going to live under the same roof as yourself. Happy together, all in one locale. This is considered to be a common law couple (and representing the highest number of couples now in Canada).
Where is this love-nest to be located?
If I'm to live with Jane, and Jane owns her own property, how much might Jane expect that I should reasonably be paying (her) for my accommodations?
In the case of my owning my own home, & then asking my partner (Jane) to live with me, should I now consider offering 'Jane' a percentage of the ownership of the property/ Is this the only way Jane might feel herself an equal partner.
Remember, a relationship is all about being in a 'partnership.' And for a partnership to work, there must be some semblance of sharing of responsibilities and of costs. If this is not put in force, then the relationship will always have one party having an unfair advantage over the other. In every partnership there is something of a power struggle that goes on, but if you're spouse is living on your property, then should you be able to pull the plug at any time you feel unhappy. Can you then ask/demand that your mate then cease and desist, or face the reality of packing up her stuff and leaving.
On the other hand, if you've paid the bulk of the costs associated with a property, let's say $100,000, and then someone meets up with you, whom you wish to cohabitate with, is it then reasonable to assume you should sign over 50% of your main asset? Is your new love interest that trustworthy and of such value? Possibly not.
A lot of this kind of thinking is rooted in money, which should not be such a large consideration, since relationships are supposed to be based on feelings, and not based on the monetary and physical aspects of life. Of course if you, at the start a relationship have very little collateral, and then changes occur where you get that big raise, suddenly any original agreement may need to have occasional amendments made. Otherwise it will become a useless jaded document.
In the instance where Jane moves in with me to my property, and then finds that any extra cash that I earn I wish to invest into bettering my property, and not showing Jane a good time, she may reconsider her decision to move in with me.
I think that it's always a good idea if the couple is to live in an owned property, to consider the possibility of shared ownership.
* Of course the next conundrum for the two of you is whether you will work the details out after you've moved in, or before. If you negotiate after the fact, it's kind of like taking home a new car, and then calling the dealership and trying to negotiate on the price and terms for the vehicle. You may get to kick the tires and take it for a spin around the block, but you don't get to take it home with you for a month or two prior to signing the deal.
There is another reason why these considerations are paramount for me, in my mind to be worked out prior to making any large decisions. This is due to the fact that during the negotiation stage you both might begin working on, you should be getting strong indications on how flexible or inflexible he/she is. Your prospective partner may show in the many days ahead that they were never as flexible a person as you would want to have as a partner . This will show you how easy or difficult it will be to solve complex issues that may come up from time to time. If your partner is completely unwilling to make any concessions, this may be a good time to reconsider any decision to take a first step into a live-in relationship.
In my next installment I shall tackle more relationship issues, ones surrounding the issues around Children, & ways you can circumvent problems that couples have to face.
Email your questions to the relationship Guru, & I'll answer them. Mark questions as Private if you do not wish for your questions to be published, Names will not be published.
howardbuchin@gmail.com
Thursday, 28 July 2011
Relationship Guru
Relationships
If any readers are considering entering into a new relationship, let me share some particular considerations that, you might wish to (or need to)iron out so that your relationship might work. I believe it's far better to prepare ahead of time, before you find yourselves motoring down a bumpy road leading to 'domestic bliss,' & in order to avoid that big pot hole that we've hit prior to landing in a domestic disaster .
Fist off I've compiled a number questions you may need to consider individually & as a couple:
* Will you be living at one residence together, or will you live separately and pay visits?
* If you own your own property, how much of your space are you willing to contribute, to your 'partner' so that he/she feels at home, & 100% comfortable? According to Wikipedia, the definition of a partnership is:
'A partnership is an arrangement where parties agree to cooperate to advance their mutual interests.'
* Are both parties both as interested as the other one, in having a full-blown serious relationship, possibly leading to matrimony &/or children?
* Is one of you hoping for only companionship and a few nice memories to carry into your senior years?
* How much of the responsibilities & expenses of your partner will you be willing (and able) to take on, and vice versa? I.e. if your girlfriend/boyfriend wants to go on annual vacations to Florida or the Islands, will you be able to afford this lifestyle?
* Should you decide to purchase any large ticket items (i.e. a freezer, fridge, stove, air conditioner, barbeques) who will retain ownership of these items you or your spouse? Does each item need to be tagged and identified as to who owns what?
This becomes important in the event of a split or separation. Unfortunately, today there is a high percentage more than ever where couples choose not to stay together past the one or two year mark. These statistics (unfortunately) speak volumes about the fact that everyone thinking about starting a live-in relationship must plan for the possibility of things just not working out.
*Do either of you wish to, or currently have pets or children & at some point, or do you wish to?
* What might happen if you two partners can not agree on some issue & what if the issue is one of the kind both parties refuse to budge on? Can a third party help you? Can you agree upon who this might be? How do you feel about attending couples counseling or psychologists' offices? Many people refuse to consider airing their differences in front of strangers and in such circumstances.
There are so many considerations that it's very difficult to come to an agreement upon where to begin. Nobody should feel that they are all alone with this feeling of being overwhelmed.
I'll start right @ home, where just about everything begins. You've now decided that the love of your life, your partner is going to live under the same roof as yourself. Happy together, all in one locale. This is considered to be a common law couple (and representing the highest number of couples now in Canada).
Where is this love-nest to be located?
If I'm to live with Jane, and Jane owns her own property, how much might Jane expect that I should reasonably be paying (her) for my accommodations?
In the case of my owning my own home, & then asking my partner (Jane) to live with me, should I now consider offering 'Jane' a percentage of the ownership of the property/ Is this the only way Jane might feel herself an equal partner.
Remember, a relationship is all about being in a 'partnership.' And for a partnership to work, there must be some semblance of sharing of responsibilities and of costs. If this is not put in force, then the relationship will always have one party having an unfair advantage over the other. In every partnership there is something of a power struggle that goes on, but if you're spouse is living on your property, then should you be able to pull the plug at any time you feel unhappy. Can you then ask/demand that your mate then cease and desist, or face the reality of packing up her stuff and leaving.
On the other hand, if you've paid the bulk of the costs associated with a property, let's say $100,000, and then someone meets up with you, whom you wish to cohabitate with, is it then reasonable to assume you should sign over 50% of your main asset? Is your new love interest that trustworthy and of such value? Possibly not.
A lot of this kind of thinking is rooted in money, which should not be such a large consideration, since relationships are supposed to be based on feelings, and not based on the monetary and physical aspects of life. Of course if you, at the start a relationship have very little collateral, and then changes occur where you get that big raise, suddenly any original agreement may need to have occasional amendments made. Otherwise it will become a useless jaded document.
In the instance where Jane moves in with me to my property, and then finds that any extra cash that I earn I wish to invest into bettering my property, and not showing Jane a good time, she may reconsider her decision to move in with me.
I think that it's always a good idea if the couple is to live in an owned property, to consider the possibility of shared ownership.
* Of course the next conundrum for the two of you is whether you will work the details out after you've moved in, or before. If you negotiate after the fact, it's kind of like taking home a new car, and then calling the dealership and trying to negotiate on the price and terms for the vehicle. You may get to kick the tires and take it for a spin around the block, but you don't get to take it home with you for a month or two prior to signing the deal.
There is another reason why these considerations are paramount for me, in my mind to be worked out prior to making any large decisions. This is due to the fact that during the negotiation stage you both might begin working on, you should be getting strong indications on how flexible or inflexible he/she is. Your prospective partner may show in the many days ahead that they were never as flexible a person as you would want to have as a partner . This will show you how easy or difficult it will be to solve complex issues that may come up from time to time. If your partner is completely unwilling to make any concessions, this may be a good time to reconsider any decision to take a first step into a live-in relationship.
In my next installment I shall tackle more relationship issues, ones surrounding the issues around Children, & ways you can circumvent problems that couples have to face.
Email your questions to the relationship Guru, & I'll answer them. Mark questions as Private if you do not wish for your questions to be published, Names will not be published.
howardbuchin@gmail.com
If any readers are considering entering into a new relationship, let me share some particular considerations that, you might wish to (or need to)iron out so that your relationship might work. I believe it's far better to prepare ahead of time, before you find yourselves motoring down a bumpy road leading to 'domestic bliss,' & in order to avoid that big pot hole that we've hit prior to landing in a domestic disaster .
Fist off I've compiled a number questions you may need to consider individually & as a couple:
* Will you be living at one residence together, or will you live separately and pay visits?
* If you own your own property, how much of your space are you willing to contribute, to your 'partner' so that he/she feels at home, & 100% comfortable? According to Wikipedia, the definition of a partnership is:
'A partnership is an arrangement where parties agree to cooperate to advance their mutual interests.'
* Are both parties both as interested as the other one, in having a full-blown serious relationship, possibly leading to matrimony &/or children?
* Is one of you hoping for only companionship and a few nice memories to carry into your senior years?
* How much of the responsibilities & expenses of your partner will you be willing (and able) to take on, and vice versa? I.e. if your girlfriend/boyfriend wants to go on annual vacations to Florida or the Islands, will you be able to afford this lifestyle?
* Should you decide to purchase any large ticket items (i.e. a freezer, fridge, stove, air conditioner, barbeques) who will retain ownership of these items you or your spouse? Does each item need to be tagged and identified as to who owns what?
This becomes important in the event of a split or separation. Unfortunately, today there is a high percentage more than ever where couples choose not to stay together past the one or two year mark. These statistics (unfortunately) speak volumes about the fact that everyone thinking about starting a live-in relationship must plan for the possibility of things just not working out.
*Do either of you wish to, or currently have pets or children & at some point, or do you wish to?
* What might happen if you two partners can not agree on some issue & what if the issue is one of the kind both parties refuse to budge on? Can a third party help you? Can you agree upon who this might be? How do you feel about attending couples counseling or psychologists' offices? Many people refuse to consider airing their differences in front of strangers and in such circumstances.
There are so many considerations that it's very difficult to come to an agreement upon where to begin. Nobody should feel that they are all alone with this feeling of being overwhelmed.
I'll start right @ home, where just about everything begins. You've now decided that the love of your life, your partner is going to live under the same roof as yourself. Happy together, all in one locale. This is considered to be a common law couple (and representing the highest number of couples now in Canada).
Where is this love-nest to be located?
If I'm to live with Jane, and Jane owns her own property, how much might Jane expect that I should reasonably be paying (her) for my accommodations?
In the case of my owning my own home, & then asking my partner (Jane) to live with me, should I now consider offering 'Jane' a percentage of the ownership of the property/ Is this the only way Jane might feel herself an equal partner.
Remember, a relationship is all about being in a 'partnership.' And for a partnership to work, there must be some semblance of sharing of responsibilities and of costs. If this is not put in force, then the relationship will always have one party having an unfair advantage over the other. In every partnership there is something of a power struggle that goes on, but if you're spouse is living on your property, then should you be able to pull the plug at any time you feel unhappy. Can you then ask/demand that your mate then cease and desist, or face the reality of packing up her stuff and leaving.
On the other hand, if you've paid the bulk of the costs associated with a property, let's say $100,000, and then someone meets up with you, whom you wish to cohabitate with, is it then reasonable to assume you should sign over 50% of your main asset? Is your new love interest that trustworthy and of such value? Possibly not.
A lot of this kind of thinking is rooted in money, which should not be such a large consideration, since relationships are supposed to be based on feelings, and not based on the monetary and physical aspects of life. Of course if you, at the start a relationship have very little collateral, and then changes occur where you get that big raise, suddenly any original agreement may need to have occasional amendments made. Otherwise it will become a useless jaded document.
In the instance where Jane moves in with me to my property, and then finds that any extra cash that I earn I wish to invest into bettering my property, and not showing Jane a good time, she may reconsider her decision to move in with me.
I think that it's always a good idea if the couple is to live in an owned property, to consider the possibility of shared ownership.
* Of course the next conundrum for the two of you is whether you will work the details out after you've moved in, or before. If you negotiate after the fact, it's kind of like taking home a new car, and then calling the dealership and trying to negotiate on the price and terms for the vehicle. You may get to kick the tires and take it for a spin around the block, but you don't get to take it home with you for a month or two prior to signing the deal.
There is another reason why these considerations are paramount for me, in my mind to be worked out prior to making any large decisions. This is due to the fact that during the negotiation stage you both might begin working on, you should be getting strong indications on how flexible or inflexible he/she is. Your prospective partner may show in the many days ahead that they were never as flexible a person as you would want to have as a partner . This will show you how easy or difficult it will be to solve complex issues that may come up from time to time. If your partner is completely unwilling to make any concessions, this may be a good time to reconsider any decision to take a first step into a live-in relationship.
In my next installment I shall tackle more relationship issues, ones surrounding the issues around Children, & ways you can circumvent problems that couples have to face.
Email your questions to the relationship Guru, & I'll answer them. Mark questions as Private if you do not wish for your questions to be published, Names will not be published.
howardbuchin@gmail.com
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